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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26234281">A Berthwarming Tale of Cold Pedes</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/aellisif/pseuds/aellisif'>aellisif</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Transformers Animated (2007)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Bottom Megatron, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Other, Sharing Body Heat, Sharing a Bed, contains meta-discussion of story, slight power imbalance, still in their right minds though</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 11:41:16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,245</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26234281</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/aellisif/pseuds/aellisif</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>This is the tale of how Optimus Prime found out what being a berthwarmer truly means, and then changed the job description.</p><p>Aye, I am poking fun at the Optimus-is-Megatron’s-berthwarmer trope here. I promise there’s no rape in this. Not even dubious consent.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Megatron/Optimus Prime</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>44</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>129</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I’ve just spent four days fixing some code responsible for a bad dataset in the research project I need to have finished my work on until the end of the month. Writing this was my reward for getting it fixed.</p><p>Heads-up before you read: Optimus is Megatron’s prisoner in here, so there is a power imbalance. Megatron is not using his power though to force Optimus into having sex, and none of this was his idea in the first place. If that still isn’t your cup of tea, that’s okay :-)</p><p>Lastly, many thanks to Han, who did a quick proof-read and constructive criticism of this :-)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Glorious Lord Megatron! You are looking tired! Is something the matter? Have our Autobot prisoners annoyed you?”</p><p>“Be quiet, Lugnut! I have a helmache!”</p><p>“Shall I punish them for their insolence, mighty Lord Megatron?”</p><p>“Oh for – I cannot recharge properly! Now be quiet.”</p><p>“I shall do my utmost to make sure your recharge will not be interrupted by these pesky Autobots anymore, Lord Megatron!”</p><p>“This has nothing to do with the Autobots! My berth is too cold! QUIET NOW!”</p>
<hr/><p>“You! Autobot Prime! Come here, at once!”</p><p>“What do you want, Lugnut? We are working as fast as we can.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Why are you looking at me like that?”</p><p>“Your engine. How hot does it run?”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“How hot does your engine run? Answer, Autobot!”</p><p>“Uhm, I don’t – the normal hot? Why do you want to know?”</p><p>“… It will have to do. Follow me, Autobot. You will be given the great honour of becoming Lord Megatron’s berthwarmer.”</p><p>“What? No! I refuse! Categorically! No! NOOO! LET ME GO!”</p>
<hr/><p>“Optimus! Are you alright? What did he do to you?”</p><p>“Nothing.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“But Lugnut took you away to become Megatron’s berthwarmer -”</p><p>“Yeah.”</p><p>“And Megatron did nothing to you?”</p><p>“I didn’t even see Megatron.”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“Lugnut literally makes me warm Megatron’s berth. I have to lie in there and warm the sheets before Megatron goes to recharge, but I don’t actually have to stay there with Megatron. Berthwarmers aren’t supposed to be seen, apparently.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Yeah.”</p><p>“Soo … You’re going back there later?”</p><p>“Not like I’m getting a choice.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Well, it could be much worse?”</p><p>“Just make sure Megatron doesn’t catch sight of you.”</p><p>“Trust me, I will. And so will Lugnut.”</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>We interrupt the fic to bring you this short Author’s Note (since I just realised that not everyone reading this may be aware of it):</em><br/>
<em>I grew up using bed warmers, those bed warmers mostly being hot-water bottles or on some occasions bricks warmed close to a fire, because winters can be a bitch. I later in life learnt that the term is also used in a derogatory way for a human whose sole purpose appears to be to warm another human’s bed, along the same lines as whore.</em><br/>
<em>This fic is playing on the fact that the word has these two meanings, although I’m aware that probably quite a few people will not be familiar with the concept of a non-human bed warmer any longer due to central heating.</em><br/>
<em>Neither is Optimus, actually, which is why he assumes the worst when Lugnut fetches him, when Lugnut is really only thinking about using him as a kind of substitute hot brick.</em><br/>
<em>Please enjoy the rest of the fic now :-)</em>
</p>
<hr/><p>“Mighty, glorious Lord Megatron, you look splendid and strong today! How was your recharge?”</p><p>“Lugnut, I have a suspicion you have something to do with how warm my berth has been every time I went to recharge recently.”</p><p>“My glorious liege’s uninterrupted recharge is a primary concern of mine!”</p><p>“Hmm … Well, whatever you did, it is working. Well done, Lugnut.”</p><p>“Glorious Lord Megatron, your gratitude is the greatest honour -”</p><p>“Then go and be honoured outside!”</p>
<hr/><p>“You could try to put a bomb in his berth, you know.”</p><p>“I could, if Lugnut didn’t search me every single time before he puts me into his berth.”</p><p>“Dang.”</p><p>“Look, Bumblebee, we have little choice at present but to cooperate. We are their prisoners. I won’t endanger you and everyone else by making an attempt on Megatron’s spark.”</p><p>“It’s just – this would be such a good opportunity …”</p><p>“Listen to Optimus, Bumblebee. As good as the opportunity is, if it goes wrong, be won’t be the only one they will punish for it. Our situation isn’t great, but they are only making us clean their base for them. Sure, they’re the most sloppy bunch of bots I’ve ever watched leaving mess everywhere, but -”</p><p>“Optimus has to warm Megatron’s berth, Ratchet! That’s – ugh! Like, so degrading!”</p><p>“I can think of several things involving Optimus and Megatron’s berth that would be even more degrading.”</p><p>“Ratchet, please -”</p><p>“What do you mean, Ratchet?”</p><p>“Uhm, stuff like singing lullabies to him, Bulk.”</p><p>“That was n-”</p><p>“I’d hate that. Really, truly hate that! And it would be very degrading, Ratchet, wouldn’t it?”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Can you sing, Optimus?”</p><p>“No, Bulkhead, I can’t, which is the problem.”</p><p>“Alright, alright, fine, I get it! Anyway. As long as Megatron doesn’t get any ideas, I’ll count that as a blessing and say let’s concentrate on how we can escape.”</p><p>“Agreed.”</p>
<hr/><p>“Autobot! WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY BERTH?”</p><p>“Uhm, slag, slag, slag, I can explain this, no, stop, STOP THIS WASN’T MY IDEA IT WAS LUGNUT’S!”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“What.”</p><p>“I, uh ̣– can you please aim that cannon somewhere else? – look, I’m just doing what Lugnut told me to do, and he’s been bringing me here to lie in your berth, and I swear you weren’t supposed to see me at all, but I can’t get out of here without Lugnut picking me up, so -”</p><p>“STOP!”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Lugnut has been ordering you to recharge in my berth?”</p><p>“N-not quite … Just lie in there. Warm the sheets.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Out.”</p><p>“With pleasure!”</p>
<hr/><p>“LUGNUT!”</p><p>“Glorious Lord Megatron, how can I serve -”</p><p>“YOU IMBECILE! YOU PUT AN AUTOBOT IN MY BERTH!”</p><p>“For the glory of the Decepticon Cause, Lord Megatron’s recharge is of primary importance -”</p><p>“You. Put. An AUTOBOT. In. My BERTH!”</p><p>“An Auto-Teddy!”</p><p>“SILENCE, Blitzwing!”</p><p>“My Lord Megatron, I was concerned for your health. Using one of the Autobots to keep your berth warm ensured you recharged better.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“He will never enter your berthroom again, Lord Megatron, I swear it on my spark.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“You know, Lugnut, perhaps you were on to something there …”</p>
<hr/><p>“Slag slag slag slag slag -”</p><p>“Calm down, Optimus.”</p><p>“What if he wants to get some revenge in? I mean, he found me in his berth. Oh Primus. <em>Megatron found me in his berth,</em> Ratchet!”</p><p>“Well yes, but apart from almost shooting you he didn’t do anything to you but tell you to get out.”</p><p>“No …”</p><p>“And he probably won’t want you to return.”</p><p>“Probably not, no.”</p><p>“That’s good, Optimus.”</p><p>“Is it?”</p><p>“Yes. It is very good.”</p><p>“Yes. I – this is good. Because if I don’t have to warm Megatron’s berth any longer, I can focus on esca-”</p><p>“AUTOBOT!”</p><p>“… SLAG!”</p>
<hr/><p>“After having given much consideration to the matter, little Autobot, I have decided that you will continue as my berthwarmer.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Lugnut will pick you up as before and deliver you to my chambers after searching you, where you will stay until I return and send you off.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Autobot, <em>why</em> are you looking at me like that?”</p><p>“No reason. No reason at all.”</p><p>“Then get back to work and be ready for when Lugnut comes to fetch you!”</p><p>
  <em>“I’m so slagged.”</em>
</p><p>“What was that, Autobot?”</p><p>“Nothing. Be ready for when Lugnut comes. Got it.”</p><p>“Good. Off with you now.”</p>
<hr/><p>“Sooo … Megatron knows you are warming his berth every night.”</p><p>“Uh-huh.”</p><p>“And he recharges between sheets that you have been lying on.”</p><p>“Uh-huh.”</p><p>“And he wants you to continue doing that.”</p><p>“Uh-huh.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Sooo …”</p><p>“Bumblebee, just – don’t, please.”</p><p>“Don’t what?”</p><p>“Don’t say it.”</p><p>“Say what?”</p><p>“Don’t say – ugh, I <em>know</em> how weird this is, okay? I don’t need you to point out that Megatron and I are practically <em>sharing a berth!”</em></p><p>“He isn’t in it when you’re in there, though.”</p><p>“And thank Primus for that!”</p><p>“Think he’d actually get in there while you’re in it?”</p><p>“I do not know, Bumblebee, and neither do I want to know!”</p>
<hr/><p>“Autobot.”</p><p>…</p><p>“Prime.”</p><p>
  <em>Snuffle.</em>
</p><p>“Autobot Prime!”</p><p>
  <em>Wheeze.</em>
</p><p>“Optimus Prime!”</p><p>
  <em>Snore.</em>
</p><p>“OPTIMUS!”</p><p>…</p><p>“I do not know whether to be annoyed at you or amazed that you would manage to recharge through your worst enemy entering the room.”</p><p>
  <em>Snore.</em>
</p><p>“Fine. You asked for it.”</p><p>
  <em>Rustle. Shuffle. Rustle.</em>
</p><p>…</p><p>“By the Allspark!”</p>
<hr/><p>“Optimus! What happened? Are you okay? Did Megatron hurt you? Why didn’t you come back last night?”</p><p>“Uhm, good morning, everyone -”</p><p>“What happened, Optimus?”</p><p>“Hi Ratchet, funny story, that, uhm, so nothing happened to me, Megatron didn’t hurt me, it just. I just.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“WHAT you just?”</p><p>“I fell into recharge in Megatron’s berth and he recharged in there with me!”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“WHAT?”</p><p>“And now he wants me to recharge in there every night so he can stay warm until morning.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>
  <b>“WHAT?”</b>
</p><p>“I DIDN’T DO IT ON PURPOSE ALRIGHT? I JUST FELL INTO RECHARGE! HIS BERTH IS REALLY SOFT!”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Primus frag, I’m too old for this slag!”</p>
<hr/><p>“You look horrible!”</p><p>“Thanks, Bumblebee.”</p><p>“Optimus?”</p><p>“I’m alright, Ratchet, I really am. I just didn’t get much recharge last night.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Did he finally -”</p><p>“Ratchet, is there any remedy for cold pedes?”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“What.”</p><p>“I swear on the Allspark, Megatron has the coldest pedes in the universe. Like, not even ice-cold. More like ‘glacier-cold’. ‘Space-cold’. ‘Liquid-nitrogen-cold’.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Optimus, you have officially lost me.”</p><p>“Megatron wants me in his berth so I can warm his pedes, which are the coldest things I have ever, and I mean <em>ever</em> felt.”</p><p>“He what.”</p><p>“<em>Please</em> tell me there’s something I can do about it! I thought I’d freeze to deactivation in that berth!”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“And here I was thinking that Megatron was cold-sparked …”</p><p>“Bumblebee, you can stop laughing at any time now.”</p><p>“Hrm. Optimus, I’m afraid there is no known recipe in the universe against cold pedes, other than some source of warmth.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Frag my functioning …”</p>
<hr/><p>“Autobot.”</p><p>“Yes?”</p><p>“What is the matter? Can you not lie still?”</p><p>“Excuse me if I’m concerned about sharing a berth with my mortal enemy -”</p><p>“We are not ‘sharing a berth’, Autobot.”</p><p>“We are literally lying in the same berth!”</p><p>“You are not supposed to be moving around.”</p><p>“Look, I know I’m your berth- and pedewarmer, but I’m not exactly a hot-water bottle -”</p><p>“A what?”</p><p>“… Nevermind. I’ll lie still.”</p><p>“I would advise you to.”</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>“Megatron?”</em>
</p><p>“Hmmnuh?”</p><p>“Uhm, could you just – if you move your arm, then I can -”</p><p>“Hum?”</p><p>“No, don’t – fine, if you are going to explain to Lugnut why I’m late for cleaning duty.”</p><p>“Autobot?”</p><p>“Megatron? I need to go to work, so if you could just -”</p><p>
  <em>Rustle-rustle.</em>
</p><p>“…”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Uhm.”</p><p>“Hrm. You were saying, Autobot?”</p><p>“I – need to go?”</p><p>“Yes, yes, get out before you’re late.”</p><p>“… Excuse me, you were the one who kept holding on to me -”</p><p>“Be here on time tonight, Autobot!”</p><p>
  <em>Slam.</em>
</p><p>“Oh, wow. Cold-peded <em>and</em> immature.”</p>
<hr/><p>“Ratchet? Uhm, can I talk to you for a moment?”</p><p>“Of course. What’s the matter, Optimus?”</p><p>“My systems – I think something is wrong with my systems …”</p><p>“What are they doing?”</p><p>“I – I don’t really know how to explain this, but in the last few nights, my engine has been running really hot when I was in Megatron’s berth …”</p><p>“… right. Anything else?”</p><p>“Uhm, I don’t know if it’s got anything to do with it, but every time I’ve come out of recharge recently, Megatron was, uhm, kind of holding on to me?”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“He never touches me before he goes to recharge, apart from pushing his pedes against my back armour, of course, but I still wake up with him holding me? I don’t know why that keeps happening. I mean, I try to lie as far away from him as I can -”</p><p>“Mhm.”</p><p>“- it just doesn’t seem to help -”</p><p>“Mhm.”</p><p>“- but I know he isn’t aware of doing it, because I only go to recharge after he does, and he never tries to hold me then -”</p><p>
  <em>Beeep.</em>
</p><p>“… Optimus, I realise this might be difficult for you to talk about, but I have to ask. Megatron hasn’t done anything to you, has he? Touched you in any way you didn’t want?”</p><p>“No. I mean, not consciously. And I don’t really know how he ends up holding me.”</p><p>“That’s all that’s been happening? Him holding you?”</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>“Hmm … Well, your system scans don’t show any recent interfacing activities, so that seems to be true …”</p><p>“Ratchet, seriously, Megatron hasn’t tried <em>anything</em> the like. I mean, I know we all expected him to, <em>I</em> expected him to, but he just – he’s as uninterested as can be.”</p><p>“… while that’s good to know, I’m afraid that isn’t mutual.”</p><p>“… what?”</p><p>“Optimus, your systems have recognised Megatron as a potential interface partner.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“WHAT? No, that can’t be right, there must be some mistake -”</p><p>“There isn’t. I’m guessing it’s because of you sharing the berth with him. It’s something bonded bots usually do, and your prolonged exposure to it has now triggered a heat cycle.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Oh, Primus.”</p><p>“Optimus, you will be alright. Remember, bots do not have to act on their heat. You’ll just be – tempted, but you’ll be able to resist. It’ll be uncomfortable, no doubt, but you don’t have to give in. Or, if you prefer, I could -”</p><p>“No thank you, Ratchet!”</p><p>“… should I take that personally?”</p><p>“NO! Sorry, I didn’t – I just -”</p><p>“Any of the others you might want to go to? It’ll come in waves, so if you get some relief before you go to Megatron, it’ll be less of a bother.”</p><p>“I’ll think about it. Thanks, Ratchet.”</p><p>“Sure, kid. Don’t worry. You’ll get through it. Three days at most, and since Megatron isn’t interested …”</p><p>“Yeah.”</p><p>“Not much of a consolation, I know, but small mercies? He won’t even know unless he touches your chassis, and if he doesn’t do that – just try to make sure he doesn’t end up holding onto you.”</p><p>“… right, let me get that straight: I literally just told you that somehow, some way, he always ends up holding me by the end of the night. And now you’re telling me to stop him from doing it? How am I supposed to do that?”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Well, I’m guessing you won’t get much sleep the next three nights then.”</p><p>“… how is that a ‘small mercy’?”</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>Rustle.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Shuffle.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Rustle.</em>
</p><p>“Seriously, Autobot, do I have to repeat myself again? I thought I was clear on this. I expect you to lie still while doing your job!”</p><p>“Sorry. I am trying!”</p><p>“Then why are you not succeeding? How difficult can it be to just lie still?”</p><p>“Sorry. No, don’t touch -”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Your chassis is hot.”</p><p>“I, uhm, well …”</p><p>“Are you in heat, Autobot?”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Fine. Go ahead.”</p><p>“Uh. What?”</p><p>
  <em>Snick.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>CRASH.</em>
</p><p>“…”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Is that your generic reaction when someone opens their panels for you, or is it just for me?”</p><p>“…!”</p><p>“I asked you a question, Autobot. And get up off the floor, that is very undignified. Even for you.”</p><p>“!!!”</p><p>“I will not repeat myself, Autobot.”</p><p>“You can’t be serious!”</p><p>“Dial down your volume, will you.”</p><p>“NO I WON’T! YOU CAN’T JUST OPEN YOUR PANELS AND EXPECT ME TO FRAG YOU!”</p><p>“Why not? Obviously you’re in heat, and I do not have the patience to put up with you tossing around because you need relief. A quick frag’ll take the edge off and then we can both recharge.”</p><p>“… I refuse.”</p><p>“Fine. Suit yourself. Don’t think for a moment though that your heat excuses you from doing your job.”</p><p>“I’ll lie still.”</p><p>“Then get back in the berth. I’m tired of talking.”</p><p>
  <em>Rustle.</em>
</p><p>“Uhm, could you close your panels?”</p><p>“What, so easily embarrassed? Never seen a valve, Autobot?”</p><p>“My name is Optimus Prime, and I have seen valves before, I just don’t want to see yours!”</p><p>“That is rather insulting.”</p><p>“I – that wasn’t what I -”</p><p>“Oh, so you do like it?”</p><p>“I – NO, that was NOT -”</p><p>“Hmm …”</p><p>
  <em>Screech.</em>
</p><p>“Thought so. Very few mechs don’t like my valve. It is rather nice, if I do say so myself.”</p><p>“Can you – please stop touching yourself -”</p><p>“Why? I think I have just discovered an egregious oversight on my part. I could do with an overload or two. Haven’t had one in a while.”</p><p>“Please -”</p><p>“Heat protocols are a nuisance, aren’t they?”</p><p>“You are doing this on purpose!”</p><p>“… there are very few mechs who would stick two digits up their valve <em>by accident,</em> Autobot. Now. I can put on a show for you or you can frag me. Your choice.”</p><p>“You’re the enemy, I can’t just frag you -”</p><p>“Oh please. You’re in heat. We aren’t <em>interfacing,</em> little Autobot.”</p><p>“This is just a joke to you, isn’t it? Is this how Decepticons go about it? Frag whoever is available?”</p><p>“Touchy. Is there someone else you would rather go and frag? I might let you.”</p><p>“NO, I just -”</p><p>“As for the second question, yes, this is exactly how Decepticons go about it. We can hardly afford removing soldiers from the battle lines just so they can go home and frag their sparkmates.”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“If I say that I want to go to Ratchet, will you let me?”</p><p>“Primus, are you always this fussy outside of battle, little Prime? I couldn’t care less if you fragged the entirety of your team to get through your heat as long as you lie still when you’re in my berth and were quick about it, I am tired!”</p><p>“So … I have a choice?”</p><p>“Primus … WILL you make up your processor, Prime? It’s either me or whoever in your team – OH!”</p><p>
  <em>Slurp.</em>
</p><p>“AH!”</p><p>“You’re right. I like your valve.”</p><p>“Hngh … Yes, yes, there – oh -”</p><p>“Right then, let’s see whether you like my spike …”</p><p>
  <em>Thunk. Thunk. Thunk.</em>
</p><p>“Oh, yes, yes, yes, hn, faster, Prime, come on, <em>come on …”</em></p><p>
  <em>Thunk-thunk-thunk-thunk-thunk-</em>
</p><p>“Slagging pit, Optimus, frag me like you mean it!”</p><p>“Don’t mind me if I do!”</p><p>
  <em>THUNK-THUNK-THUNK-</em>
</p><p>
  <em>BZZZZZZZZZZ.</em>
</p><p>…</p><p>…</p><p>…</p><p>“… wow.”</p><p>“Shut up and lie still, Autobot.”</p><p>…</p><p>…</p><p>…</p><p>
  <em>“Megatron? Are you still awake?“</em>
</p><p>“Primus frag, Prime, what does it take to shut you up?”</p><p>“Uhm, any chance we could do that again? Maybe? Uh, one of these days?”</p><p>“…”</p><p>“Right, just thought I’d ask -”</p><p>“Your heat will last at least three days, won’t it, little Prime?”</p><p>“I guess?”</p><p>“There’ll be plenty of opportunity for a repeat performance then, won’t there?”</p><p>“I guess? If you want …”</p><p>“Well, surprisingly enough, you do know how to spike. I could be convinced if it’ll get you to lie still!”</p><p>“Oh, it will! I promise!”</p><p>“First impressions indicate otherwise.”</p><p>
  <em>Rustle.</em>
</p><p>“See? Lying still.”</p><p>“Mhm …”</p><p>…</p><p>“Megatron?”</p><p>“WHAT?”</p><p>“Recharge well.”</p><p>“… you too.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Please feel free to leave comments and/or speculate about how Megatron being prone to cold pedes will influence the war *sniggers*</p><p>Also, sweetspark, comment moderation is turned on ;-) If you want to insult me or readers of this fic or just want to be a general nuisance, be my guest. I’ll exercise my right to keep it between the two of us, though. Unfriendly comments will therefore go directly into my hot-water bottle, because frankly, I do not have the patience nor am I willing to let you bother other people who just want to read this fic and enjoy it.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Outtake</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Optimus finds out just why exactly Megatron wants him in his berth.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This scene was originally in the main story, but my beta thought, and I agreed, that it was far funnier if Optimus asked Ratchet about a remedy for cold pedes without readers already having the information that Megatron suffers from cold pedes at night. Since I had it written anyway, I figured I might as well post it after all … because actually, I thought it was too entertaining to not post ^^’ (yes, I’m doing it for the attention … don’t we all?)</p>
<p>So whatever this may look like at first, rest assured there is nothing terrible happening here ^^</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>…</p>
<p>…</p>
<p>…</p>
<p>“Autobot, your orders are to stay in the berth when I arrive.”</p>
<p>“It’s warm. I had my engine run extra-hot.”</p>
<p>“I don’t care. Get in the berth.”</p>
<p>“Uhm, maybe we could find a compromise?”</p>
<p>“Are you scared of being in the same berth as me, little Autobot?”</p>
<p>“Can you blame me?”</p>
<p>“… fair point. Get in the berth.”</p>
<p>“I don’t want to.”</p>
<p>“Get. In. The berth!”</p>
<p>“Why? You just want a warm berth, it’s perfectly warm, I checked, you can just climb in and – NO STOP WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”</p>
<p>
  <em>RUSTLE.</em>
</p>
<p>“That’s more like it.”</p>
<p>“Let go of me, Megatron!”</p>
<p>
  <em>Rustle.</em>
</p>
<p>“PRIMUS FRAG NO STOP DON’T DON’T DON’T!”</p>
<p>
  <em>Snigger.</em>
</p>
<p>“GET YOUR PEDES AWAY FROM ME YOU SADISTIC FRAGGER THEY’RE COLD!”</p>
<p>“Why do you think I want you in my berth?”</p>
<p>“I don’t know! Oh, Primus, oh, they’re so cold, what did you do? Did you go for a swim in the Arctic Ocean when you went out earlier?”</p>
<p>“Did I do what?”</p>
<p>“Nevermind. Oh Primus. Oh Primus, they’re cold!”</p>
<p>“Yes, little Prime, you’ve said that. You, on the other hand, are very warm, so in the interest of creating a balance in this berth, you will stop trying to push my pedes away from you.”</p>
<p>“Are you serious? I’ll freeze to deactivation before they’ll warm to anything less than -50°C!”</p>
<p>“A warrior weathers all conditions without complaint.”</p>
<p>“Says the Decepticon pushing his pedes against my back armour to keep them warm!”</p>
<p>“…”</p>
<p>“Be silent and lie still.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Author’s Notes and Thoughts on the story</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Purely an essay about the story, not another chapter.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>My eternal dilemma</strong>
</p><p>So it’s been some time since I published <em>A Berthwarming Tale of Cold Pedes,</em> and I find myself still returning to it, thinking that I want to write about what caused this little foray into a fic genre that I usually avoid, not quite like the plague, but similarly carefully.</p><p>This discussion, be forewarned, includes me mentioning rape/non-con/dub-con and talking about how people tag or do not tag for it, so please take this as your personal trigger warning and don’t continue reading if you are sensitive about these topics.</p><p>At the same time, please let me make equally clear that I’m not writing about this to shame avid writers/consumers of rape/non-con/dub-con fics. I don’t need to like what you like to understand that you like it.</p><p>The reason I wrote the story and this essay are the tags, in particular the dub-con tag.</p><p>Or perhaps I should say, I wrote it because it is, at times, so, so, so difficult to figure out how, when and for what to use that particular tag. That isn’t a Transformers-specific issue either, it’s something that happens in every fandom, but since that is what I wrote the story for, you are treated to this essay.</p><p>I often think and frequently talk about trigger tags with people around me, because rape/non-con fics more often than not trigger me. By which I don’t mean it’s a squick of mine. My reaction is not “uuuh, that’s, like, really uncomfortable, I’d really prefer not to read that”.</p><p>It’s a trigger. My reaction is more along the lines of feeling nauseous up to being physically sick in extreme cases, but at the very least I’ll be walking around a whole day (or three, or seven) unable to tear my thoughts away from what I read and unable to cope with it. On a bad day, even seeing rape/non-con tagged fics disturbs me. No, that isn’t the fault of the authors. That’s what the filters are for, and thanks to AO3’s tagging system, it is generally easy for me to avoid that.</p><p>It is considerably less easy to avoid stumbling into dub-con fics with little warning.</p><p>Aye, I know. It ain’t that difficult to filter those, either.</p><p>I’m not talking about fics that are tagged as dub-con, though. I’m talking about fics where the author’s and my definition of dub-con clash, and as a result, I get triggered. For example, this happens quite frequently with fics centering around certain tropes, like sex pollen, heat-fic or “aliens made them do it”. And again, yes, I could filter them, but here’s the crux:</p><p>Whether they trigger me or not is very much a question of how they are written. Consequently, I genuinely enjoy some of them, while others leave me feeling vaguely ill, and this creates my eternal dilemma of “to chance it, or not to chance it” with other people’s stories. At the same time, it also creates the dilemma of “what do I tag, when and how” for me.</p><p>Because sure, I could blame other authors for not tagging properly when they post a story. But I don’t think it’s that simple. Over the time I have spent in fandom, I have seen awareness for triggers increase greatly, which is something I am grateful for. My impression is that there are far fewer authors these days who do not tag/warn properly for rape/non-con than even five years ago. But some tags, including the dub-con tag, are simply not that easily defined. Spotting rape/non-con is, I would say (with no studies backing me up on this, just my personal impression), easier for authors than spotting dub-con, because that can be used to describe such a wide variety of situations:</p><p>External pressure to have sex (political marriage, aliens, heat cycles).</p><p>Being under the influence of some aphrodisiac.</p><p>A power imbalance between the characters (prisoners, masters/servants/slaves).</p><p>Again, I haven’t done a study on this, but based on my impressions, a lot of the time the underlying premise of those fics boils down to “the characters do want to fuck, but external circumstances are such that they cannot fuck with a good conscience”.</p><p>In the case of Megatron and Optimus, it’s obviously being on two opposing sides of a war, and if one doesn’t want to describe the whole peace process at length or do an AU, there are very few options available how to get them into a bed/berth together. Creating a situation where they can blame external reasons for their “slip” is therefore a fairly convenient way of getting them to bang without the associated politics. Yet in creating such situations, someone else can reasonably argue that consent cannot be given freely. Some people therefore choose to tag for dub-con, others do not. Some of those fics I would tag as dub-con, some as non-con, some I wouldn’t tag at all, because as far as I am concerned, even with the situation being what it is, consent can be and is given.</p><p>Out of those thoughts and various discussions I had with other authors and friends about our opinions on when to use the dub-con tag, <em>A Berthwarming Tale of Cold Pedes</em> developed. And you are certainly free to disagree with me, but as far as I am concerned, it is the kind of story that does not trigger me, because despite the power imbalance, Optimus and Megatron end up having sex <em>by choice</em>.</p><p>Please bear with me as I explain why, for me, this story balances on the edge of being dub-con (and yes, by that I mean that I am not entirely comfortable with some of Megatron’s actions in there either), but does not cross the line.</p><p>
  <strong>Non-con, dub-con and sex</strong>
</p><p>You might be asking yourself how I can make such a statement. Well, my most important reason is certainly not that since I wrote the fic, it cannot be dub-con. No.</p><p>The reason is because my sticking point in pretty much every story that involves questionable circumstances leading to sex is, how are the intent to have sex and the possibility to decline communicated?</p><p><em>A Berthwarming Tale of Cold Pedes</em> features a classical dub-con setting with Optimus being Megatron’s prisoner. It also features a situation where Optimus, against his wishes, is being made to share Megatron’s berth (a few words on the term “berthwarmer” later on). There is a clear power imbalance in Megatron’s favour and he is exerting that power over Optimus, and then on top of it all, the heat-trope comes into play. The situation, regardless of how over-the-top and ridiculous I have written it, can derail at any point in time. In fact, the Autobots, Ratchet especially, are expecting it to derail.</p><p>To understand why I don’t consider it dub-con, I have to explain that I differentiate between the circumstances of the general situation of the characters, and the circumstances and details of how sexual activity is negotiated. It is, I think, possible for characters to have sex in a less-than-optimal situation as long as every participant is aware of why the circumstances are less than optimal.</p><p>To kind-of-quote a kink-meme I read some time ago, consent can be given freely <em>if and provided</em> the powerless party can say no <em>and</em> walk away with no consequences.</p><p>That pretty much encapsulates how I approach the matter of the dub-con tag. The ability and, most importantly, the <em>knowledge</em> that the powerless character can say no and not be punished <em>in any way, fashion or form</em> for it defines whether I consider sex dub-con or not.</p><p>By that I mean that not only I as the reader, but the powerless character in the story need to know that saying no is possible and will be without consequences.</p><p>Since I don’t want to use examples from other people’s stories I’ve read, I’ll explain how I worked that concept into <em>A Berthwarming Tale of Cold Pedes</em> and hope that will sufficiently illustrate it.</p><p>
  <strong>How do Optimus and Megatron end up having sex?</strong>
</p><p>Megatron, in this fic, is not a good person and entirely too entitled in some ways. He has no issue with letting Lugnut bully Optimus into warming his berth, and later on bullying him into sharing the berth with Megatron. He equally has no trouble teasing a heat-affected Optimus by self-servicing in front of him.</p><p>He is not a paragon of virtue here, don’t get me wrong. Yet there are boundaries that Megatron, in this fic, recognises as such and is absolutely not willing to disregard.</p><p>One of those boundaries is that Optimus, as his prisoner, is not an object of sexual interest to Megatron. They sleep in the same berth, Megatron ends up cuddling Optimus in his sleep, but he does not touch Optimus in improper ways while awake. As a prisoner, even one he shares his berth with, Megatron’s intentions towards Optimus are completely and utterly non-sexual.</p><p>This changes once he finds out Optimus is in heat, which is when he offers to interface with him.</p><p>Imperative word being “offers”. There is another boundary there. Megatron knows Optimus is in heat. He also knows (and we do, because Ratchet said it earlier) that heat afflicts bots, but does not render them mindless sex-addicts. Megatron’s reasons, at this stage, are pragmatic; he offers Optimus to frag him, because this is what Decepticons do. For him, offering is not coercion, it is an offer that he has probably made to several of his officers in the past when their partners were not present.</p><p>What is also part of that culture, though, is to accept “no” for an answer. So when Optimus, understandably panicked that his worst fears are about to come true, declines, Megatron accepts it without question. He does not start telling Optimus what will happen if he doesn’t. He doesn’t try to convince him, at least not in the first instance. He only tells him to get on with his job and ignore his heat.</p><p>He is still Megatron, though, so when Optimus asks him to close his panels, he cannot resist egging Optimus on, crossing a line there. Predictably (for onlookers, anyway), Optimus feels more threatened, and so lashes out at Megatron, defending himself with what means he has at his disposal.</p><p>A lot of the clues here are in how Megatron reacts, because that is not anger and threats of dire retribution. He explains. He tells Optimus that he has a choice. He provides background information about his own actions, clarifying that as far as Megatron is concerned, this is an offer extended to Decepticon soldiers. In other words, he is treating Optimus the same as he would treat Lugnut, Blitzwing or Strika under the same circumstances.</p><p>Optimus, while wildly worried about what is happening, takes notice of all of that. He is able to see that even as Megatron is provoking him, he does not touch Optimus to do so, he touches himself. And he certainly hears it when Megatron explains that this is a common enough approach in Decepticon culture.</p><p>But of course, Megatron could be lying about all of that. So Optimus decides to test Megatron and asks about being allowed to go to Ratchet for his overload. Megatron complains about him making a fuss, but at the same time also tells Optimus that he “couldn’t care less” who Optimus does have sex with, following it up with “either me or whoever in your team”.</p><p>While this is not the classical consent-giving-conversation, it fits my requirements for establishing consent between two characters in a situation with a power imbalance and an additional complicating factor (Optimus’ heat) involved. Megatron, while not being direct about it, gets across that he will not force Optimus, not in this regard. He will provoke him, egg him on, but he will not touch Optimus without his consent.</p><p>And Optimus hears it and believes him, because Megatron’s actions match up with his words.</p><p>
  <strong>Dub-con tag, yes or no?</strong>
</p><p>To wrap this part up, I do not generally subscribe to the idea that the bigger partner or the one on top is the dominant one. In this scenario, though, I made the very conscious decision to have Optimus topping, because that means that he is in full control of what is happening, including being able to stop if he changes his mind in the middle of events.</p><p>And with that, we are back at why I don’t consider this dub-con: Optimus is free to say no and he is able to establish that Megatron is going to respect his no for what it is and not retaliate for Optimus’ denial.</p><p>Moreover, once they are done, Optimus has realised that Megatron might be willing to allow him (and perhaps the Autobots) more leeway than they all initially thought. He makes use of that by, in turn, doing things that he would not have done before that incident, and asking Megatron for another frag is, in my opinion, the least important of those. What is much more important is that Megatron has said, at this point, four times that he is tired and wants to go to sleep, and Optimus starts a conversation two times, thus keeping Megatron from recharge.</p><p>In other words, he is starting to realise that there is wiggle room, potentially a lot of wiggle room, for him, even as he is a Decepticon prisoner. And Megatron’s lack of retaliation not only to his initial “no”, but also to those two interruptions of his sleep, is a sign that Megatron is willing to concede that wiggle room.</p><p>How that will turn out for them in the future, I do not know, but I have a suspicion that Optimus is going to continue testing these boundaries and use this new knowledge to significantly improve the Autobots’ situation.</p><p>None of this, of course, invalidates the power imbalance. So if your approach to how to tag dub-con is how equal the standing of each partner is, then this is dub-con, and I won’t argue with you there. But I think this is something we as authors need to think about when we tag and when we warn, because like I said at the start, in my experience the dub-con tag can mean so very diverse content. Someone like me might consider your story dub-con when you are convinced it isn’t; and vice-versa, it is very much the same. Tagging is hard. It is impossible to account for everyone’s squicks and triggers, and if we tried to, we would end up with tons of tags for every story, which quite possibly no-one would then read.</p><p>It’s not like I have a solution for this dilemma, both my eternal dilemma of what should I read and what should I better leave alone. I am confronted with that decision every single time I come across certain fics, and perhaps some or the other of you has a similar problem and my thoughts are of some use to you, or you are an author who isn’t quite certain what they consider dub-con and whether to use that tag, and this helps you make a decision, which would be nice :-)</p><p>In any case, I would honestly be very interested to read other people’s opinions on what constitutes dub-con for them and why, so if you like, please feel free to share in the comments or e-mail me.</p><p>
  <strong>Addendum: The term “Berthwarmer”</strong>
</p><p>The main reason why I chose to use this term so many times in this fic is that, for me, the term “berthwarmer” like few others expresses the playing down of what is, ultimately, an abusive relationship.</p><p>Feel free to disagree, since this may or may not be rooted in me not knowing for a long time that “bed warmer” is a derogatory term for a human being whose sole purpose appears to be to keep someone else’s bed warm. But it really has an impact when I stumble across it. It immediately evokes images of the berthwarmer not only being powerless, but their powerlessness being taken advantage of in a sexual way.</p><p>So “berthwarmer” seems to have a much more sinister connotation than the term it is based upon does – and that, yes, kind of bugs me. In part, I suspect, because it only ever seems to be used by Decepticons when referring to their Autobot sex slaves, and I have a hard time believing that amongst the Autobots, “bed warmer” relationships are unheard of.</p><p>Just to get this clear, I am talking about consensual relationships where the basic agreement appears to be that one side provides an easy life for the other, for which the other side sleeps with them.</p><p>Would I want such a relationship? A resounding “No”, but I will also not judge people who choose this of their own free will.</p><p>But I have been struggling more and more with the term “berthwarmer”, especially once I started noticing that I have been making inflationary use of it in my own writing. And I’m not very impressed with myself. If I am going to reference sexual slavery in a fic, I can bloody well call it what it is – sexual slavery. I don’t need to use a term that, for me, is still connected to a) any kind of inanimate tool that keeps your bed warm, b) a joking reference for cats and dogs who make a habit out of sleeping in their owners’ beds, and c) a consensual relationship that may not be for me, but isn’t my place to pass judgement on.</p><p>So a great deal of the frustration that spawned <em>A Berthwarming Tale of Cold Pedes</em> arose out of the explicitly sinister connotations of “berthwarmer” as opposed to “bed warmer” as I know it – despite one term being most likely modelled on the other.</p><p>I tried to deconstruct that reduction to one meaning in <em>A Berthwarming Tale of Cold Pedes</em> by having the Decepticons use the term exclusively in its non-sexual meaning – a pragmatic solution to the problem of being cold at night that has nothing to do with sex.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you to Kat, Jay, S. and Brennus for helping me with this essay. It is version 5, and I appreciate all the time you spent on it :-)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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